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headsup
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« on: June 18, 2016, 05:54:59 AM »

finding ways to re-evaluate personal communication lately.

decided to leave FB, because i got tired of looking at pictures of cats, and food, and folks complaining etc.
( my agent still maintains a musician site, that I don't look at) but really/

sort of like cell phones everybody carries for what ever reasons, not just teen agers but adults in clubs, looking, sharing at what ever on their device.

the there's Face book, and the same situation...
 so.... remember?
 remember life BEFORE cell phones and FB?

I might be barking up the wrong trees here, but, IU've decided to leave my phone at home or in the car when I go out, and if I'm not on FB, ya think there's other ways "friends" can find me right?

How/when did we all climb aboard that device addiction and social media addiction, and why?

just asking myself and making some personal changes and tossing it out there for discussion.....

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« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2016, 11:02:58 AM »

One thing I've noticed is that the perspectives of those of us who actually experienced life BEFORE the landslide of technology are most often the ones that question that technology's use and need. When I've tried to have this type of conversation with younger folks who've always had these modern "conveniences", they can't even imaging life without them and defend their use. My personal spin on the subject is that we've gone a bit too far and are losing real touch with each other. I'm unable at this point to define what we're replacing it with as it's constantly evolving.     
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« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2016, 11:22:56 AM »

And ... get offa my lawn!  mad
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adern
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« Reply #3 on: June 18, 2016, 11:37:20 AM »

I opened a Facebook account because a friend who lives in another state talked me in to it (i am sure there were adult beverages involved). I never even looked at it and in several weeks time my wife informed me that I had a lot of unanswered "friend requests". "So what" says I. "Well its rude to not accept them". Well off I go to accept these very important friend requests, and I don't look at Facebook for several more weeks. When I do, I realize that every stupid photo of every stupid thing that is being done by anyone I have ever met is suddenly showing up on my page.

I promptly closed my account.

One of the big problems with the thing is that everyone can comment immediately without actually thing about what they are saying. No cooling off periods. No sobering up period. I think the whole thing tends to dumb down society as a whole.
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Anthony J. Dern
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« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2016, 12:16:10 PM »

You realize that you can un-follow or un-friend anyone who insists on posting stuff that you don't like or agree with while finding that the poster is not looking to debate and doesn't care if what they've posted is remotely true? I've unfollowed many and told good actual friends and family that I am un-friending them as far as FB goes. It does not mean we are no longer friends in real life. I just want to get back to pics of kittehs and doggeez.   
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SMan
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« Reply #5 on: June 18, 2016, 12:44:24 PM »

I have a whopping 37 friends on fb.  I don't follow any of them and rarely post.  I participate on no other social media.  I have a flip phone that I rarely have on my person (and yes my lawn has a no trespassing sign).
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« Reply #6 on: June 18, 2016, 01:06:12 PM »

Yep...got this cartoon on FB! rolleye
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« Reply #7 on: June 18, 2016, 02:13:48 PM »

I was on FB once about 7-8 years ago,lasted about 2 weeks.I have a cell phone,not a smart phone one of those Star Trek flippy things.The duo I'm in is on FB because its an easier way to show the younger club bookers our stuff they can watch it on there smart phone's and maybe they'll hire us.
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Caleb
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« Reply #8 on: June 18, 2016, 03:10:05 PM »

A lot could be said about what FB and social media has done and is doing. But the thing I think of most is how it's destroying the art of conversation.  Not that our society was very good at the art of conversation anyway, but now it's all about "commenting," "liking," and "sharing."  But mostly it's about commenting. 

We've all had those conversations where the other person isn't really listening, but only waiting for an opening so he or she can speak.  Social media cuts out the waiting space and just gets directly on to the commenting.  I've even seen here where people apologize for "such a long post," knowing the mentality of the day is to just skim and get on with the comments.  It's almost as if everyone is talking but no one is listening. Strange.
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Riverbend
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« Reply #9 on: June 18, 2016, 03:32:42 PM »

[quote author=Caleb link=topic=50078.msg440237#msg440237 date=1466262605

We've all had those conversations where the other person isn't really listening, but only waiting for an opening so he or she can speak. [/quote]
Sure makes you appreciate the genuine conversations we have and the folks we have them with, eh? I talk to my dogs and cat a lot more these days because they really listen and talk back with their eyes and actions.  bowdown And my wife and kids, when I see them...they're great to talk with.
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« Reply #10 on: June 18, 2016, 03:48:23 PM »

I'm not sure when I last had a genuinely enjoyable conversation. Most times people just want to talk about nonsense like politics, the hot topics of the day, etc, usually while parroting what their favorite news personality just told them. All wearisome stuff for me.
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adern
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« Reply #11 on: June 18, 2016, 04:51:32 PM »

... the thing I think of most is how it's destroying the art of conversation...

Amen. (can I say amen here?) I have seen three "youngsters" sitting on the same sofa and texting to each other rather than talking. makes one wonder where we will be in ten years.
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Anthony J. Dern
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« Reply #12 on: June 18, 2016, 04:55:41 PM »

I have a whopping 37 friends on fb.  I don't follow any of them and rarely post.  I participate on no other social media.  I have a flip phone that I rarely have on my person (and yes my lawn has a no trespassing sign).

We are brothers from different mothers, only you have more FB "friends".    
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Melodeous
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« Reply #13 on: June 18, 2016, 11:45:14 PM »

I have neither a cell phone nor FB account. I tried the cell phone thing but found myself worrying about safeguarding it, charging it, losing it, missing calls, checking in...sheesh. Without exaggeration, when I handed it to my wife and said enough is enough you'd have thought I was asking to divorce her rather than the phone. Anyway, she's used to me being just my old incommunicado self again and I'm off the leash. Regarding FB, really? When I first got wind of the concept I thought of teenage girls. You could have knocked me over with a feather the first time I heard a bunch of grown men talking about their own use of it.
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headsup
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« Reply #14 on: June 19, 2016, 05:53:43 AM »

I posted this rant, from a place of personal frustration, that others have chimed in on.

Around and about conversation,.
Conversation NOT about what they saw on FB, or TV, or the news, but honest conversation about, lets say, personal health, family, kids, or just something dumb, like "what bugs me" or "what I'd like to see more of" etc.
 You get the idea....

Because i travel a bit, and play different venues in different towns, and have very good ears, it's easy to "eves drop on conversations (sometimes I don't have an option (loud people).

But for the most part, it's about something they saw on FB, or some media item they need to "share".

Don't get me wrong, That's what, ( i guess) people talk about now, and that's ok, but I don't really hear much about genuine feelings, or "personal" opinions on important matters anymore.
Again, I could be wrong, but it has been mentioned a few times since my OP, the "art" of conversation, just seems to be non existent lately.
 i go to friends places, or rehearsals, and it's always about "did you see the.....on... etc.
then they try to explain something which, of course is lost in the translation, and then they say something like, "I'll send it to you" or something stupid.

Sorry to prattle on here, just my over sixty, working musician/gardenner/cook, home renovator guy take on things...../
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L07 Shooting Star
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« Reply #15 on: June 19, 2016, 05:58:01 AM »

I could never wrap my head around facebook.  We have an account, mostly to keep up with what's going on with the family.  My 2 daughters and my wife use it a lot for chit chat, updates on grandkids activities, etc.  It's handy for that.  We don't accept friend requests, "like" posts, or comment, unless it's within our little family group.  I still haven't figured out how it really works.  I can't even understand who's facebook page I am looking at half the time.

All we ever had for a cell phone until June 2 was one flip phone between my wife and I.  We carried it when travelling in case of emergency.  All that changed when my wife slipped on a hill while walking our dog and broke her ankle in three places.  This happened on May 14.  On that day, I happened to have our phone with me at work.  She laid there helpless yelling for help for 20 minutes until another dog-walker lady came along and called 911 on her smartphone.  That same lady called me at work from her phone.  After that incident, it was decided neither of us would be anywhere without carrying a modern phone.

I think a distinction between "social media" and modern "devices" needs to be made.  Our new phones are (to us) such a leap in ability to communicate and share instantly from anywhere to anybody.  This is probably not news to most of you.   
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Barefoot Rob
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« Reply #16 on: June 19, 2016, 06:08:35 AM »

Just got back from a gig and most of the people were on there smart phone's texting and whatever.The one's not on there phone's enjoyed us enough to put a total of $54 bucks in our tip jar..I do have a flip phone for long distant call's as I live in a college town and all my calls seem to different area code's.
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« Reply #17 on: June 19, 2016, 07:08:33 AM »



All of the venues where I play have an active presence on Facebook. They all advertise the entertainment and whatever else they are serving up on Facebook.

Almost all the people with whom I collaborate musically have an active presence on Facebook.

When I'm playing someplace I create an event for it on Facebook and then people in my community can rsvp and others can see who is going. That's like gravity. The greater the mass, the greater the attraction. (e.g. if Charlie and Nancy are going, I'll go too).

When I'm wondering what my musical buddies are doing I can find out by looking on Facebook.

I post about shows, respond to comments from people who have been to my shows,  and indicate that I'm going to others' shows when I plan to be there, to be supportive.


It seems that folks in the area where I play have adopted Facebook as the common medium for things musical. Though I have no interest in Facebook for recreation or diversion, it is useful for business.



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ducktrapper
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« Reply #18 on: June 19, 2016, 02:53:10 PM »

I have  flip phone which I almost never use. When my wife got her new smart phone, Verizon offered her a second phone for "nothing". She asked me if I wanted it and I was going to take it but then found out that it would cost me an extra $75 a month. This is my biggest complaint with these phones. When I was in Canada and my wife called me, my flip phone would also be charged minutes. Why should you have to pay more to use an extra phone? Why should both phones be charged for the same calls? Can we say "rip off"?   
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Caleb
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« Reply #19 on: June 19, 2016, 04:30:19 PM »

I posted this rant, from a place of personal frustration, that others have chimed in on.

Around and about conversation,.
Conversation NOT about what they saw on FB, or TV, or the news, but honest conversation about, lets say, personal health, family, kids, or just something dumb, like "what bugs me" or "what I'd like to see more of" etc.
 You get the idea....

Because i travel a bit, and play different venues in different towns, and have very good ears, it's easy to "eves drop on conversations (sometimes I don't have an option (loud people).

But for the most part, it's about something they saw on FB, or some media item they need to "share".

Don't get me wrong, That's what, ( i guess) people talk about now, and that's ok, but I don't really hear much about genuine feelings, or "personal" opinions on important matters anymore.
Again, I could be wrong, but it has been mentioned a few times since my OP, the "art" of conversation, just seems to be non existent lately.
 i go to friends places, or rehearsals, and it's always about "did you see the.....on... etc.
then they try to explain something which, of course is lost in the translation, and then they say something like, "I'll send it to you" or something stupid.

Sorry to prattle on here, just my over sixty, working musician/gardenner/cook, home renovator guy take on things...../
Part of this is just what people talk about today, and it also reflects well the modern attention span.  Things like FB and 24-hour news help us to constantly feed ourselves information, but at the same time it helps us not pay close attention.  It is truly strange.  

Something I've also noticed about FB and other social media is that when it's mentioned, a lot of people almost apologize for being involved in it.  I hear things all the time that sound like: "Well, I have an account, but rarely check it or post..." etc.  And it's not just adults I hear this from, but I've heard teenagers say similar things.  It's almost as if everyone wants to have an account, but all the while they can't feel sure about their place in it all.  Another strange thing.  

My name is on my wife's account.  Occasionally someone from my school days will request to be friends.  She'll hand me the computer and I'll reject the request.  Being "friends" with someone like that (who probably really only wants to see if I'm fat and bald now anyway) isn't something I'm interested in.  

Regarding smartphones:
I love my smartphone, but I see it as more of a tool than a toy.  Not only can I get my email on the go, check the Larrivee forum, etc, but I can take and edit wonderful photos, listen to music, audiobooks, podcasts, etc.  It has made my average day much better and been a serious help to my efforts in self-education.   If all I was doing was watching cat videos on FB with it, yeah, it'd be pretty much a contributing factor to brain rot.  But there really is a ton that can be done with these things for the good of an individual.  

They are also just another monthly bill, as duck pointed out.  In this way all our gadgets and conveniences have become the paid servants of yesteryear.  
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