Bad gigs- stories from the front lines

[Caleb]

I was talking yesterday with a co-worker who plays lead guitar in a cover band that plays a lot of bars, and he told me one of his favorites.  They were just starting a song when a woman comes staggering up to him.  She's drunk, sixty-ish, wearing tight black spandex pants (there should be a law..) and a bright red budweiser jacket.  She gets right up to him and yells "Play some Metallica", only when she tried to say Metallica her false teeth fell out and landed on his pedal board.  It freaked him out, so without thinking he kicked them off his pedals.  They ended up in the middle of the dance floor, which is full of people.  The lady gets down on her hands and knees and is crawling around everyone's feet trying to find her teeth, which are getting kicked all around the room.  The drummer is supposed to be singing, but he saw the whole thing and loses it, so they end up stopping the song because the two of them are laughing so hard they can't play.  Meanwhile the poor granny is still groping for her teeth.

Classic.